2. SELF LOVE:

Self-love is a popular term today that gets tossed around in normal conversation: “You have to love yourself more.” “Why don’t you love yourself?” “If you only loved yourself, this wouldn’t have happened to you.” “You can’t love another person until you love yourself first.” These are just a few of the self-love directives we give or get to suggest a way to more living fulfillment.

What is self-love?

Is self-love something you can obtain through a beauty makeover or a new set of clothes? Can you get more of it by reading something inspirational? Or, can a new relationship make you love yourself more? The answer to all of these questions is no. Although they feel good and are gratifying, you can’t grow in self-love through these types of activities

Self-love is not simply a state of feeling good. It is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological, and spiritual growth. Self-love is dynamic; it grows through actions that mature us. When we act in ways that expand self-love in ourselves, we begin to accept much better our weaknesses as well as our strengths, have less need to explain away our shortcomings, have compassion for ourselves as human beings struggling to find personal meaning, are more centered in our life purpose and values, and expect living fulfillment through our own efforts. So now we know that self-love motivates you to make healthy choices in life. When you hold yourself in high esteem, you are likely to choose things that nurture your well-being and serve you well.

These things may be in the form of eating healthy, exercising or having a healthy relationship.

So in short self-love means:

• Having high regard for your own well-being and happiness

• Taking care of your own needs

• Not sacrificing less than you deserve

• Talking to and about yourself with love

• Prioritizing yourself

• Giving yourself break from self-criticism

• Trusting yourself

• Being nice to yourself

• Forgiving yourself when you are not being true or nice with yourself

• Taking care of your physical health too

• Love yourself with acceptance of all your flaws without any judgment and resistance.

Ways to practice self-love

#Become mindful.

People who have more self-love tend to know what they think, feel, and want. They are mindful of who they are and act on this knowledge, rather than on what others want for them.

#Act on what you need rather than what you want.

You love yourself when you can turn away from something that feels good and exciting to what you need to stay strong, centered, and moving forward in your life, instead. By staying focused on what you

need, you turn away from automatic behavior patterns that get you into trouble, keep you stuck in the past, and lessen self-love.

#Practice good self-care.

You will love yourself more when you take better care of your basic needs. People high in self-love nourish themselves daily through healthy activities, like sound nutrition, exercise, proper sleep, intimacy, and healthy social interactions.

#Making room for healthy habits.

Start truly caring for yourself by mirroring that in what you eat, how you exercise, and what you spend time doing. Do stuff, not to “get it done” or because you “have to,” but because you care about yourself.

#Set boundaries.

You’ll love yourself more when you set limits or say no to work, love, or activities that deplete or harm you physically, emotionally, and spiritually, or express poorly who you are.

#Protect yourself.

Bring the right people into your life.

I love the term frenemies. It describes so well the type of “friends” who take pleasure in your pain and loss rather than in your happiness and success. My suggestion to you here: Get rid of them! There isn’t enough time in your life to waste on people who want to take away the shine on your face that says, “I genuinely love myself and life.” You will love and respect yourself more.

#Forgive yourself.

We humans can be so hard on ourselves. The downside of taking responsibility for our actions is punishing ourselves too much for mistakes in learning and growing. You have to accept your humanness (the fact that you are not perfect) before you can truly love yourself. practice being less hard on yourself when you make a mistake. Remember, there are no failures if you have learned and grown from your mistakes; there are only lessons learned.

#Live intentionally.

You will accept and love yourself more, no matter what is happening in your life, when you live with purpose and design. Your purpose doesn’t have to be crystal clear to you. If your intention is to live a meaningful and healthy life, you will make decisions that support this intention, and feel good about yourself when you succeed in this purpose. You will love yourself more if you see yourself accomplishing what you set out to do. You need to establish your living intentions, to do this.

If you choose just one or two of these self-love actions to work on, you will begin to accept and love yourself more.

Just imagine how much you’ll appreciate you when you exercise these seven steps to self-love.

It is true that you can only love a person as much as you love yourself. If you exercise all of the actions of self-love that I describe here, you will allow and encourage others to express themselves in the same way. The more self-love you have for yourself, the better prepared you are for healthy relating. Even more, you will start to attract people and circumstances to you that support your well-being.

Finally, to practice self-love, start by being kind, patient, gentle, and compassionate to yourself, the way you would with someone else that you care about.

It is truly said that if you don’t love yourself then you cant give love to others. If your cup is full of love, care, and compassion for yourself then only you can give those emotions to the world and what you give to the world will come back in a thousand many folds.

3. FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is an active process in which you make a conscious decision to let go of old grudges, resentment, bitterness, past hurt leading to a feeling of understanding, empathy, and compassion towards a person who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness or not.

When someone wrongs you somehow, you might feel certain you will never be able to get over it. Even after your immediate anger passes, you might continue to dwell on the betrayal instead of letting it fed into the memory.it’s pretty common to feel this way. But not

Being able to forgive can harm you most. Forgiveness might seem challenging, in part because it’s misunderstood. You might believe forgiving someone means:

>Forgetting what happened

>Implying the pain they caused was no big deal

>Automatically resuming your previous relationship

In reality forgiveness means to let go of your anger, hurt, and desire for vengeance.

You might accept that what happened is now in the past, recognize that people make mistakes, and begin cultivating compassion instead.

Think you’re ready to forgive but have no idea where to start? That’s OK. It’s not always easy

Many people view forgiveness as something that helps the person being forgiven. It certainly can make them feel better, but forgiveness benefits you most of all.

<Forgiveness helps you heal.

Holding onto resentment can sour you and keep you from finding peace. When you can’t forgive, your emotional wounds can’t close and heal.

“When you forgive, you’re not saying what someone did was OK. You’re deciding to let go of the burden of stuck and unresolved emotions,” explains Kim Egel, a therapist in San Diego, California.

“Forgiveness allows you to let go of pain and continue with a lighter heart.”

Forgiveness, in other words, enables you to begin moving away from anger and resentment before they seep into all areas of your life.

<Forgiveness can improve other relationships

Harboring anger towards someone who hurt you doesn’t just affect your relationship with that person but grudges and angry feelings can eventually overflow into your other relationships too.

You might have a short temper with loved ones, have struggled to trust again, or have difficulty building new relationships.

Offering compassion instead of anger can help increase kindness and feelings of connection to all people, not just the person you forgive.

<Forgiveness has health benefits too

By practicing forgiveness, you may be doing your health a favor.

Forgiveness helps reduce stress. Less stress can have positive health outcomes, including like,

lower blood pressure

reduced anxiety

better sleep

improved self-esteem

Forgiveness may also allow you to let go of unhealthy anger, which can contribute to,

stress

muscle tension

heart problems

decreased immune function

In general, forgiveness has an overall positive impact on emotional health, well-being, and empathy for others.

It can also lead to more fulfilling relationships — including the one you have with yourself.

Forgiveness can help you reconcile

First, it’s important to understand that you can forgive someone without resuming contact or picking a relationship back up.

You can forgive someone even if you know you can never have the same relationship.

Depending on the circumstances, you may even need to avoid contact.

That said, everyone makes mistakes. When a loved one hurts you, forgiving them can open the door to relationship repair.

In many cases, the act of forgiveness can help someone who inadvertently caused pain to realize how they hurt you.

This provides an opportunity for learning and growth

Forgiveness may not mend your relationship immediately, but it’s a good start

Are you ready?

If you don’t feel like you can extend forgiveness immediately, that’s OK. It can take some time to reach that place.

When it comes to forgiveness, authenticity is essential. Forced forgiveness doesn’t benefit anyone since you’re still holding on to pain and anger.

Asking yourself below 3 questions can help you determine if you’re ready to forgive:

Who am I doing this for?

“Forgiveness is an inside job,”

This is true for two different reasons:

• You set forgiveness in motion.

• It’s mainly for you.

Other people involved in the situation, even loved ones who know the circumstances, might encourage you to forgive.

Ultimately, you’re the one who needs to make that decision. You aren’t truly forgiving when you do so grudgingly or because others say you should.

This type of forgiveness doesn’t honor your needs and may not resolve your frustration and pain.

Do I have perspective?

It’s both normal and healthy to need to process and address difficult emotions after experiencing injustice or betrayal.

Sitting with those feelings can be pretty painful, especially in the beginning. Some distance and reflection can help you explore the situation through an objective lens.

Does recalling the wrongdoing bring up a desire to punish the other person or make them suffer? Or can you now accept that

many complex factors could have played a part in what happened?

Recognizing that people in pain often cause pain themselves can help you cultivate compassion without condoning or minimizing their actions.

Remember: HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE

It’s also worth considering whether you’re still hurting because of the actual event, or because your memories of the betrayal are trapping you in a cycle of distress.

If your pain mostly stems from the latter, choosing to forgive can help you let those memories go.

Am I willing to take the necessary action to forgive?

Forgiveness takes some work on your part. You can’t just say “I forgive you” and be done with it — at least, not if you want your forgiveness to have meaning.

You may never understand why someone did something. But forgiveness requires you to look at your anger and pain and choose to let it go.

This will usually involve developing some understanding of the other person and their circumstances. You can’t truly forgive without empathy and compassion.

Committing to forgiveness is only the beginning, and memories of your hurt may still resurface after you’ve decided to forgive. Holding on to compassion and patience can help you succeed.

How to prepare yourself for forgiveness:

Once you feel ready to forgive, you can take a few additional steps to make sure you’re really ready.

Talk through your feelings

Before you can forgive someone, you’ll want to make sure you can put your feelings about what happened into words. This requires you to first embrace those feelings, even the unwanted ones.

A good way to check whether you can fully express your feelings? Talk to someone you trust about them.

Even if you don’t want to get into all the details of what happened, your support system can play an important role in the process of forgiveness.

They’ve probably already helped you get through the worst of your pain, and they can offer more support as you begin to heal.

Try meditation if you’re finding this difficult. It won’t work overnight, but it will start you down the right path.

Find the bright side

When someone hurts you, you’re probably not in a position to notice any benefits that came out of the situation. In time, you may have more emotional space to recognize what you’ve gained.

Maybe a close friend did something cruel or dropped you without explanation. Despite your pain and anger, you explored why.

Eventually, they explained they were struggling with serious mental health symptoms, and you helped them find support.

Even when you can’t identify a clear benefit, you may simply feel like a better person for embracing compassion and understanding.

If you’re having trouble forgiving a big hurt, practice self-compassion instead of giving yourself a hard time.

It’s normal to struggle, but you can get more accustomed to practicing forgiveness by making it a point to forgive regularly in your daily life.

This isn’t as tough as it sounds.

Someone eats your lunch at work, Maybe they’re struggling to afford food for themselves. Practice compassion and forgive the theft instead of getting angry

The person parked next to you scraped your car as they were backing out? It happens. That’s what insurance is for! Anger won’t repair your car, and forgiveness will help both of you feel better about the incident.

FORGIVE YOURSELF

Another aspect of forgiveness is to forgive yourself too. Sometimes we get so harsh on ourselves that we cannot forgive ourselves for some wrong decision taken in life for choosing a career or a job or being in a relationship.

People often struggle with forgiveness when they blame themselves, at least in some small way, for what happened.

Self-compassion and self-forgiveness are important tools to have before trying to forgive someone else.

It’s important to consider whether self-blame may be getting in the way of your ability to forgive.

Remember, someone else’s decision to hurt you is never your fault.

If you have trouble forgiving yourself, particularly for circumstances where you did nothing wrong, talking to a therapist can help.

Forgive smaller things first

Doing the deed

You feel ready to forgive, and you’ve made and choose to commit forgiveness.

So how do you go about forgiving someone?

This might seem especially difficult if you can’t reach the person you’re forgiving.

“You can forgive regardless of your situation with the other party.” --UNKNOWN

You don’t need to have contact with someone to forgive them since forgiveness is primarily for your benefit.

Below are some tips that can help you act on your decision to forgive:

Write a letter

If you prefer to avoid face-to-face contact with someone you’ve forgiven, writing a letter may offer a safer way to express your feelings.

A letter is one-sided. You get to share what you experienced without being interrupted. The other person’s explanations and apologies may have meaning and benefit, but you must have the chance to say what you need to say.

Letters can be a good way to offer forgiveness to a toxic family member, an abusive ex, or anyone you don’t want to resume contact with.

You can write the letter simply for your own benefit and keep it until you feel ready to reach out.

If contact isn’t a safe option, you might send it with a false address to protect your location or have someone deliver it for you.

Share your feelings with someone else

It may not always be possible to reach the person you’re forgiving. They may have passed away or moved.

“It can be a major block to the healing process when you believe you can’t heal because you can’t express forgiveness,”

But you don’t need to have an exchange with someone in order to forgive them.

Once you choose to forgive, you can complete the process by sharing your decision with someone else, such as a loved one, a mentor, a spiritual leader, or someone who understands the situation — even a therapist.

If no one feels right, you can journal about your decision to forgive.

Although your memories of being hurt may linger, forgiveness allows you to continue moving forward.

Practicing forgiveness can make it easier to:

How can you practice forgiveness in routine

>Focus on the good things in life

You can’t ignore the challenges life throws at you. But prioritizing compassion and empathy can make it easier to notice the good things and give them more weight than the bad.

If something positive did come out of the betrayal, you already have some practice finding the flower amongst the rubble, so to speak.

You don’t have to believe that everything has meaning or happens because of destiny. You can make your meaning and find your good, no matter what life brings.

>Make good emotional health a lifetime goal

Forgiveness can teach you a lot about compassion, but continuing to work on self-growth and strengthening your feelings of empathy toward others can help you cope with difficult circumstances in the future.

Life is long, and you might experience more than one injustice.

Just as good physical health can help you weather illness and injury, good mental health can help you remain strong in the face of emotional duress.

“The more tools you have in your pocket, such as positive perspectives, healthy choices, and a strong support system, the better off you’ll be when you need to address difficult emotions, such as those brought up by the process of forgiveness,”

>Work towards your happiness

It’s normal to want someone to regret the pain they inflicted. The truth is, this doesn’t always happen.

Some people aren’t capable of recognizing when they cause pain. Others don’t see their mistake, or simply don’t care. You may never get an explanation or an apology.

Letting bitterness and resentment maintain a hold over you only gives them power. Instead of letting the past hold you back, use what you learned from the experience to take steps to protect yourself from future pain.

Practicing forgiveness and taking action to live your best life can help you find joy and peace.

The bottom line

Forgiveness might seem difficult to practice, but it’s a skill you can develop.

Sure, it can seem unfair. After all, they hurt you. But forgiveness can help you move past these feelings and find peace.

Forgiveness is a process, not a single action.

There is a myriad approach to understanding this process and making sense of it is unique to your situation and context.

Let’s see a few simple steps to forgive other people who have hurt you:

Step 1: Acknowledge

Acknowledge the hurt. Who hurt you and why did they do it? What is the context of the situation, and how long ago did this happen?

Step 2: Consider

Consider how the hurt and pain have affected you. The word “consider” is key here because it involves thinking before making a decision. Before you decide on whether or not you will forgive this person, consider the negative feelings you’ve acquired since the incident.

How has the pain changed you? How detrimental was the person’s mistake to your life or someone else?

Step 3: Accept

Accept that you cannot change the past. No matter how much you wish this pain could be reversed, it’s time to admit to yourself that your anger toward the person won’t redeem what they have done. It is during this step that you must thoughtfully consider whether or not you want to forgive.

Step 4: Determine

Determine whether or not you will forgive. This is when the forgiveness process will either begin or end. This decision should not be made lightly, as it will determine the future of your relationship with this person.

Step 5: Repair

Repair the relationship with the person who wronged you. Before any act of forgiveness or reconciliation, rebuild the connection you used to have with this person.

In most cases, you will be the instigator of this repair, but if you have thoughtfully engaged in the previous 4 steps, then there is a higher chance of success.

Note that you are repairing the relationship, not restoring it. It will likely take more time for the relationship to return to normal, whatever that may look like to you. Acts of repairing can include kind words, simple gestures, or even gifts.

Step 6: Learn

Learn what forgiveness means to you. Up until now, you’ve probably thought that forgiveness is more for their benefit, not yours.

But once the relationship is on the path to restoration, and you’ve given yourself time to accept the reality of the past, it’s clear that forgiveness is a way for you to find closure. Closure means something.

Step 7: Forgive

Forgive the person who wronged you. In some cases, this will be silent.

You may be compelled to verbally forgive the person, even if you do not expect a kind response, but if you have followed through on the previous steps, then their reaction won’t really matter. What will matter is that you have found a way to let go and move on.

Always remember you cannot control others but you can control your own choices.

4. GRATITUDE

THE SCIENCE OF GRATITUDE:

Taking a moment to be thankful for the good things in life can help you cultivate a healthy work-life, manage stress, and develop a deeper connection to people, especially in tough situations.

What are the effects of practicing gratitude?

>It boosts your mental health.

Those who write letters of gratitude reported significantly better mental health in 12 weeks after their writing exercise ended. While not conclusive, this finding suggests that practicing gratitude may help train the brain to be more sensitive to the experience of gratitude down the line, and this could contribute to improved mental health over time.

>It helps you accept change.

When we are comfortable with the way things already are, it can be difficult to accept when things change—let alone feel grateful for that difference. But when we make it a habit to notice the good change brings, we can become more flexible, and accepting

>Gratitude can relieve stress.

The regions associated with gratitude are part of the neural networks that light up when we socialize and experience pleasure. These regions are also heavily connected to the parts of the brain that control basic emotion regulation, such as heart rate, and are associated with stress relief and thus pain reduction. Feeling grateful and recognizing help from others creates a more relaxed body state and allows the subsequent benefits of lowered stress to wash over us.

People who practice gratitude report:

• Fewer physical symptoms of illness

• More optimism

• Greater goal attainment

• Decreased anxiety and depression, among other health benefits.

>Gratitude also positively impacts our brains.

Practicing gratitude lights up the brain’s reward center. One study found that practicing gratitude by keeping a gratitude journal lights up the ventromedial prefrontal cortex, a key brain region associated with reward processing in the brain.

Four Ways Gratitude Benefits Our Brains

1) It can help relieve stress and pain.

The regions associated with gratitude are part of the neural networks that light up when we socialize and experience pleasure. These regions are also heavily connected to the parts of the brain that control basic emotion regulation, such as heart rate and arousal levels, and are associated with stress relief and thus pain reduction.

2) Feeling grateful and recognizing help from others creates a more relaxed body state and allows the subsequent benefits of lowered stress to wash over us.

3) It can improve our health over time. To be grateful is also closely linked to the brain’s `mu-opioid” networks, which are activated during close interpersonal touch and relief from pain—and may have evolved out of the need for grooming one another for parasites. In other words, our data suggest that because gratitude relies on the brain networks associated with social bonding and stress relief, this may explain in part how grateful feelings lead to health benefits over time.

4) It can help those with depression. Perhaps even more encouraging, researcher Prathik Kini and colleagues at Indiana University performed a subsequent study examining how practicing gratitude can alter brain function in depressed individuals. They found evidence that gratitude may induce structural changes in the very same parts of the brain that we found active in our experiment. Such a result, in complement to our own, tells a story of how the mental practice of gratitude may even be able to change and rewire the brain. When you express gratitude and receive the same, our brain releases dopamine and serotonin, the two crucial neurotransmitters which are called feel-good hormones too. They enhance our mood immediately, making us feel happy from within.

Four Ways to Train Your Brain to Practice More Gratitude

1) Take time to notice what’s around you. Practicing mindfulness helps you tune in to the present moment. It is possible that if you are a grateful person, you are more mindful of others’ gestures. The more often you tune into your awareness, the greater the chances you will notice all the good that’s around you to feel gratitude for, which can then bring satisfaction and happiness. Our ability to pick up on the beauty of nature, kindness from one another, the chance to make a living via a job, all require our ability to be cognizant of ourselves and our surroundings. Being mindful of help in the kitchen, or the color of the sky allows us to generate gratitude by simply noticing them.

2. Practice gratitude for the little things. We often remember to be grateful for big events, like graduating from university or getting married, but it can be more difficult to feel grateful for the small things we do every day. Reminding yourself that eating a meal, for example, is in itself special can be very powerful. Your immediate awareness of the food in front of you, combining flavors while removing hunger, is a great way to enjoy gratitude as often as you eat! Another example is feeling grateful in the morning for being able to comfortably sleep at night. We gain comfort, satisfaction, and peace by practicing mindfulness and gratitude in this repeated fashion.

3. Share your gratitude for your loved ones. Most of us are a little bit guilty of taking our loved ones for granted. The next time you notice a kind act by a loved one, why not show gratitude by simply saying ‘thank you’, or giving a hug? We ought to show appreciation and not let kind acts go unnoticed. Training yourself to show your gratefulness for loved ones can strengthen your relationships with others.

4. Spread gratitude via your social media platforms. Social media can feel so negative at times, but using it to share your gratitude can help create a more positive online atmosphere. For example, share an uplifting moment from a recent event or a lesson you learned from a book you read, or a photo of a place near you that you’re grateful for.

Spreading good, and in a unique and uplifting way, is one way we each can do our part in this digital age to remind each other that we have a lot to be grateful for. Let us each inspire one another in this way. Training our minds to practice gratitude more often is possible if we are mindful of ourselves, each other, and our environment. Let us widen our circle of appreciation. Please share your ideas for reminding yourself to be grateful. Practicing gratitude can be a game-changer: it has far-reaching effects, from improving our mental health to boosting our relationships with others. Living your life with gratitude helps you notice the little wins—like the bus showing up right on time, a stranger holding the door for you, or the sun shining through your window when you wake up in the morning. Each of these small moments strings together to create a web of well-being that, over time, strengthens your ability to notice the good.

Building your capacity for gratitude isn’t difficult. It just takes practice. The more you can bring your attention to that which you feel grateful for, the more you’ll notice to feel grateful for!

Start by observing. Notice the thank yous you say. Just how much of a habitual response is it? Is it a hasty aside, an afterthought? How are you feeling when you express thanks in small transactions? Stressed, uptight, a little absent-minded? Do a quick scan of your body—are you already physically moving on to your next interaction?

Pick one interaction a day. When your instinct to say “thanks” arises, stop for a moment and take note. Can you name what you feel grateful for, even beyond the gesture that’s been extended? Then say thank you.

How can we Practice Gratitude? There are two key components of practicing gratitude:

#We affirm the good things we’ve received

#We acknowledge the role other people play in providing our lives with goodness.

Most of us know it’s important to express thanks to the people who help us or silently acknowledge the things we are grateful for in life. Research has linked gratitude with a wide range of benefits, including strengthening your immune system and improving sleep patterns, feeling optimistic and experiencing more joy and pleasure, being more helpful and generous, and feeling less lonely and isolated.

Practicing Daily Gratitude: As Jon Kabat-Zinn says, “The little things? The little moments? They aren’t little.” Saying thank you, holding the door for someone, these little moments can change the tone of your whole day.

One of the most powerful ways to rewire your brain for more joy and less stress is to focus on gratitude. Here are simple ways to become more grateful:

<Keep a Gratitude Journal.

Establish a daily practice in which you remind yourself of the gifts,

grace, benefits, and good things you enjoy. Recalling moments of

gratitude associated with ordinary events, your personal attributes,

or valued people in your life gives you the potential to interweave a

sustainable theme of gratefulness into your life

You can write to be grateful for your relationship, your body, friends,

community, health, travel, nature, technology, experiences,

materialistic things, etc.

<Remember the Bad

To be grateful in your current state, it is helpful to remember the hard times that you once experienced. When you remember how difficult life used to be and how far you have come, you set up an explicit contrast in your mind, and this contrast is fertile ground for gratefulness. Also, develop a habit of being grateful in the challenging situations of your life.

<Ask yourself three questions

Meditate on your relationships with parents, friends, siblings, work associates, children, and partners using these three questions:

“What have I received from __?”,

“What have I given to __?”, and

“What troubles and difficulties have I caused?”

Share Your Gratitude with Others. Research has found that gratitude can strengthen relationships. So the next time your partner, friend, or family member does something you appreciate, be sure to let them know.

<Come to Your Senses.

Through our senses—the ability to touch, see, smell, taste, and hear—we gain an appreciation of what it means to be human and of what an incredible miracle it is to be alive. Seen through the lens of gratitude, the human body is not only a miraculous construction but also a gift.

Use Visual Reminders. Because the two primary obstacles to gratefulness are forgetfulness and a lack of mindful awareness, visual reminders can serve as cues to trigger thoughts of gratitude. Oftentimes the best visual reminders are other people.

<Make a Vow to Practice Gratitude

Research shows that making an oath to perform a behavior increases the likelihood that the action will be executed. Therefore, write your own gratitude vow, which could be as simple as “I vow to count my blessings each day,” and post it somewhere where you will be reminded of it every day.

<Watch Your Language.

Grateful people have a particular linguistic style that uses the language of gifts, givers, blessings, blessed, fortune, fortunate, and abundance. In gratitude, you should not focus on how inherently good you are, but rather on the inherently good things that others have done on your behalf.

<Go Through the Motions.

Grateful motions include smiling, saying thank you, and writing letters of gratitude. By “going through grateful motions,” you’ll trigger the emotion of gratitude more often.

<Think Outside the Box.

If you want to make the most out of opportunities to flex your gratitude muscles, you must look creatively for new situations and circumstances in which to feel grateful. Please share the creative ways you’ve found to help you practice gratitude

It’s easy to be grateful when things are going well, but what about when life is throwing you a curveball like losing your job, a parking ticket or you catch a cold, how then do we stay grateful? So here are some practical ideas.

First, you are what you think so if you think gratitude that is what you see, attract and become.

Second, make a mental list of all the things going well and repeat it whenever you get the chance, doing dishes, laundry, driving, etc. Third, and I think the funniest and most potent is saying thank you as many times a day even when things aren’t going your way, set a goal, today like I will say thank you to everything which I touch through my hand.

Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary. ~ Margaret Cousins

* Importance of gratitude *

Once a disciple of Shree Bhagvan asked him, “would you please tell us the importance of showing gratitude?

Sri Bhagavan: See, the universe is so structured that if somebody has helped you in some way and you express gratitude, that means the heart is functioning. If the heart is functioning, you will naturally express gratitude. If there is no gratitude, it means something is wrong with the heart. So the first thing is if there is no gratitude, you must see what is wrong with your heart. So, When gratitude comes, the heart sends out a signal which is received by the person who has helped you.

And when that person has received that signal, what happens is much more blessings come to you from that person. Suppose let us say you want somebody to bless you.

Let’s say your mother, father, or grandfather. You may go and tell, I am going to the exam and please bless me and they will bless me. But Suppose you fall at their feet. There are some channels in the feet. As you fall, you press your feet. And these channels are coming into their heart. And from their heart, the blessing comes out. That’s why? Similarly, when you express gratitude, it goes straight into the heart of the person who has helped you and you will get many more blessings from that person. That is the advantage you have.

**From a functional level, you know that the heart is okay, which means it is also healthy. If the heart is expressing gratitude, as an organ it is healthy. Otherwise, something is wrong with the heart. The other thing is you immensely gain from more blessings. The more blessings you gain from people, the more it enters into your bank account. Just like you have your bank account, there is a good karma account and a bad karma account. And this is noted in the good karma account.

Tomorrow when there is a problem and you pray, what I will do is, I will take from the good karma account and solve your problem. If let us say, there is no good karma, then I take from your father’s account, your mother’s account, or some other account. If nobody has got it, then I take it from the cosmic account. So it has to be taken from some account. Otherwise, we cannot do a miracle, we cannot really help you. So by expressing gratitude, your own account is getting big. So it will help me to help you in the future.